


Sick Of Layin' Down Alone

by partyghoul



Category: Adam Lambert (Musician), Kris Allen (Musician), Tommy Ratliff (Musician)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-04-07
Updated: 2012-11-11
Packaged: 2017-11-18 10:46:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 16,546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/560171
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/partyghoul/pseuds/partyghoul
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>*Adam Lambert grabs Tommy Ratliff and gives him a short, but amazing kiss at the AMA's* No one thinks too much about it, besides Tommy and Adam of course! They both knew something was there! Now they have to admit it to eachother and themselves!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Heat Of The Moment

**Author's Note:**

> This is my second Adam Lambert story, but my first Adommy fantasy. First posted on Fanfic.net. The story became really popular, and people requested that I put it on here.  
> All Of My Chapter Titles Are Based On Song Names You Can Look Up The Songs On Youtube. This Week's Chapter Is Based On The Song "Heat Of The Moment" By Asia

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Do you remember when we used to dance  
> And incidents arose from circumstance  
> One thing led to another we were young  
> And we would scream together songs unsung
> 
> It was the heat of the moment  
> Telling me what my heart meant  
> The heat of the moment showed in your eyes

*All of a sudden, Adam grabs Tommy and shoves his tongue down his throat. It was meant to be just a one sided kiss, so Adam was surprised to feel Tommy responding, in a good way. Adam still thought it was for fun, but the look in Tommy's eyes was undeniable, he wanted this, almost as much as Adam did.*

As soon as Adam stepped off stage, he was attacked by a numerous amount of reporters.

"Hey Adam was that whole performance planned?" Shouted one overly excited woman.

"No, most of it was played by ear." Replied Adam while giving out autographs to many of his young fans.

"Adam! Over here! Who was that man you kissed? Is he your new love interest?" Asked one reporter.

"That guy was Tommy Ratliff, and no, he's not my new guy. He is completely straight and he had no idea that the kiss was coming, it was all me." Said Adam, now out of breath from answering hundreds of questions.

Once the paparazzi was kicked out of the studio, Adam went to go find Tommy. After about ten minutes of searching through a dozen dressing rooms, he found the one he was looking for. Adam knocked on the dressing room door twice and patiently waited. Tommy answered in only a white t-shirt and some extremely tight pants.

"This is gonna be rough." Thought Adam.

"Hey Tommy, can we talk?" Asked Adam in almost a whisper.

"Sure man, what's on your mind?" Said Tommy, motioning for Adam to sit down.

"Well uh…I was wondering...did you have a problem with me kissing you?" Adam asked hesitantly.

"No, I thought it was kinda cool why?" Asked Tommy.

"Well, everyone's having a total bitch fit over it."

"No way!" Tommy asked, his jaw dropping.

"Yeah…" Said Adam now playing with the zipper on his leather gloves.

"But, what about Madonna, and all those other performers?"

"I know, I know. It's a double standard, two guys making out is unacceptable."

"That's fucked up."

"It is, but don't worry about." Adam said, patting Tommy on the knee.

The only reason Adam kissed Tommy on stage was because he got caught up in the song. Everyone with a brain knows that For You Entertainment it about having a good time, and yes, even about having sex. Also, everyone knows that Adam is a very sexual being, it's not his fault, he was born that way. It's not like he was in love with Tommy or anything, it was all done in the heat of the moment. But what Adam didn't know is that Tommy enjoyed it a little more then he should have. Even though he was straight, there was something about that kiss, something…extraordinary. For the next couple of months the AMA's were all anyone ever talked bout. Interviews, jokes, everything. If they went on a show that's what people brought up. As much as Adam didn't regret the kiss, it just seemed to be taking away from his music, and that wasn't cool. It was like the kiss was the only thing on the planet that was worth talking about. It seemed as though neither Adam nor Tommy could catch a break. Adam didn't regret it, not at all. He thought Tommy was an attractive guy; in fact he liked a lot of things about Tommy. And when he kissed him it sent something through him. He didn't know what it was but he wanted to do it again. He wanted to feel Tommy's lips on his again. Adam wanted those sparks to fly, just one more time.

Tommy on the other hand, had the same feelings, but pushed them away. He figured it was nothing. He just assumed that he was being his same old self, liking new things, and kissing Adam was the first new thing to happen in a long time.

But as time went on, all of those suppressed feelings came back to haunt him. They started to show their ugly heads when Tommy's place was being fumigated. Adam told him he could stay with him, and seeing as he had nowhere else to go, Tommy didn't see a reason not to. Adam was helping Tommy unpack when he found Tommy's journal. He didn't like going through peoples' things simply because he would want the same respect shown to him. But against everything telling him to just walk away, he couldn't. So, before Tommy could see, Adam hid the journal under a pile of clothes until he could get a good look at it. The right moment came when Tommy had decided to take a nice, long shower. As soon as Adam heard the water running, he went in the other room where the journal was hidden.

Adam opened up the notebook and began scanning for anything interesting. Most of it was pretty random; just things he had done during the day, blah, blah, blah. Adam was getting kinda bored until he found the entry for the day of the AMAs.

*Today was the AMAs. So amazing! Great show…Adam kissed me. I know he did it for show, he even said so. But I don't know, there was just something about it. I liked it, a lot.*

The last words echoed in Adam's mind, I liked it, a lot. Adam couldn't believe it. Of course Adam had liked it; after all, Tommy was a sexy, young, amazing guy. But the thought of Tommy actually enjoying the kiss had never even crossed hit mine. Not until now.


	2. I Wanna Do Bad Things With You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I don't know what you've done to me  
> But I know this much is true  
> I wanna do bad things with you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Week's Chapter Is Based On The Song "Bad Things" By Jace Everett

It was day two of Adam and Tommy living together, Tommy was finally all moved in and settled. Adam was sitting on the couch watching TV when Tommy came into the room. Adam tried not to look at him because even the smallest look brought back the words; I liked it, a lot. Those words, five little words, were driving Adam crazy. He didn't know what they meant exactly. Adam was immediately brought out of his thoughts when he caught a whiff of Tommy's delightful scent. Tommy was wearing a black t-shirt and tight blue jeans, light eye makeup, and his hair was messy, just the way Adam liked it. Adam could barely stop himself from staring. It was, maybe, twenty minutes before Adam decided to get up and walk out of the room. He was searching the fridge for something to drink when Tommy came in.

"Did I do something wrong?" Tommy asked, cocking an eyebrow

"No, not at all. Why do you ask?" Adam said while sipping his soda, avoiding eye contact.

"Because when I came in you got up and left."

"I got thirsty, can't I get a drink in my own house?" Adam said a little louder than he had meant to.

"Well of course, why are you getting so defensive?" Tommy asked stepping up to Adam.

"I'm not!" Adam shouted, now inches away from Tommy's face.

Both Adam and Tommy knew that they needed to cool off before they did something they would soon regret. Tommy grabbed his coat and slammed the door as he left. Adam sat down, letting out a long sigh.

He had gotten angry because of all these unresolved feelings. He didn't want to be mad at Tommy; in fact, he almost couldn't stay angry with him. Adam went into his bathroom and took a long shower, using the time to try and clear his mind. Tommy decided to go out all night, get wasted, and eventually kicked out of the bar. Thankfully, some fan-girl waitress used a pay phone to call Monte to pick him up. Adam called Tommy's cell at least a dozen times – no answer. Adam couldn't sleep that night: knowing that he yelled at Tommy made him uneasy. The only reason Tommy was able to sleep was because he had passed out.

The next morning Tommy went back to Adam's house. He stood outside the door tapping his foot nervously. It was a few minutes before he opened the door and went in. Adam was at the table with a cup of coffee sitting in front of him. When Tommy walked in, Adam immediately stood up. They looked at each other for a few seconds. Then, Adam decided to break the silence after he couldn't take it any more.

"I'm sorry I was a jerk. I didn't mean to yell at you..."

Adam was cut off by Tommy wrapping him in a tight embrace.

"I know, I'm sorry too." Tommy said into Adam's shoulder.

They stayed hugging until they spotted Monte standing in the doorway.

"Look ye here. What do we have going on here?" He said smirking

"Oh my God! Monte, get your head out of the gutter." Adam said, giving him a prissy look.

"Ok, but can we get a move on, love birds?" He asked, tapping his watch.

"Yeah, let's go." Tommy said, looking back at Adam before turning to walk away. For the rest of the day, they were in the recording studio. When Adam and Tommy came home they were so tried that they decided to just go to bed, and sleep in.

They only got to sleep in a little bit because they had to go record an interview for VH1. But other than that, things were going back to normal, by the end of the day, everything would be fine. The interview ended up taking up most of the day. That night the whole band went out to celebrate the end of a long, hard day. Luckily, nothing was planned for the remainder of the week, so they stayed out until they were all too wasted to function. The next morning was a major bitch. Everyone was severely hung over and lying around Adam's house. One at a time, everyone left until only Adam and Tommy remained.

"Do you have any coffee?" asked Tommy, weakly sitting up off the floor.

"Not made." Adam mumbled, sliding off a chair. They slugged into the kitchen and made some coffee. After finishing off the entire pot by themselves, they both started to wake up.

The sun was bright and shining. It was the kind of day that begged you to come outside. Adam looked out the window and saw this. Since Adam was a peacemaker, he decided that he needed to make up for the fight.

"You wanna do something today?" Adam asked, looking at Tommy.

"Um…Sure I guess."

"Ok let me know." Adam said with a smile leaving the kitchen, but before he got completely out of there, Tommy stopped him.

"Adam."

"Yeah?" Adam turned on his toes to face Tommy.

"You don't have to do anything cause you were being an ass." He said with a bit of a laugh in his voice.

"I know I just I want to do something with you because I was an ass and I don't want that between us." Adam put his hand on Tommy's shoulder.

"I know Adam, I know."

"Ok so where do you want to go?" Adam asked, smiling.

"I'm not sure…want to just hang out at the mall?" Tommy said with a shrug.

"Yeah, that sounds cool. Go shopping, look for guys, and get something to eat."

"Ha-ha yeah look for guys." Tommy said, laughing.

"Oh, sorry, yeah girls for you, guys for me."

They both broke out in laughter. It didn't take them long to get ready, they were going for a low profile.

Once they got to the mall they went window-shopping, hoping that something would eventually catch their eye. They went through the entire mall once before deciding that they would go into the bookstore. They looked around a bit not finding anything. It was kinda dull, just wandering around. So they went to the food court.

"Wow." Adam said, taking a bite of his burger.

"What?"

"Today's been boring, I'm sorry."

"It's ok, Adam."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, you don't have to be sorry about anything. I get it, you were mad for some reason. I'm not pressing and I get it."

"Yeah?"

"Yes, Adam, now if you don't stop, I'm going to leave you."

"Ok…do you want to go after we eat?"

"Yeah, there's nothing for us to do."

They went back to eating, without another word to each other.

They got done eating and were about to leave when they passed a group of three girls.

"Oh my God! You're Adam Lambert and Tommy Joe Ratliff!"

"Yes we are." Said Adam, looking to Tommy, then to the girls.

"Oh! Can we have an autograph?" Squeaked the girls.

"Sure." Adam and Tommy answered in unison.

"YAY!" Squealed the girls.

Then more people showed up, and then more, and more. Until they were surrounded by a bunch of fan girls. All of them wanting a picture or an autograph. Then they started tugging and pulling, wanting a piece of them. Soon they couldn't take it. Some guys came and started to pull the girls away, it helped, but not enough. After about half an hour, they finally got enough girls off of them for them to get away. They ran as fast as their legs could take them. When they got to their car they looked the doors and took a deep breath.

"That was close." Adam said, letting out his breath.

"Yeah, and we thought today was gonna be boring."

"Yeah." Adam looked at Tommy and laughed.

"Oh my God, Tommy you're bleeding!" Adam was pointing at the space behind Tommy's ear. He was right, there was a thin line of blood flowing down from Tommy's ear to his neck.

"Oh…I'm ok, it'll be fine." He said, whipping away some of the blood.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, if anything happens then you can drag me to the hospital."

"Ok."

"Let's just get out of here before more come back."

"Yeah" Adam turned on the car and they left.

Being at home never felt so good before. Adam had convinced Tommy to let him look at his ear and treat it. He had Tommy sitting on his bathroom sink and he was cleaning the wound.

"Thanks."

"No problem."

"What are we going to do now?" Asked Tommy, still sitting on the sink.

"Anything I guess." Adam walked over to the waste bin and threw the cloth in and walked back over to Tommy. Adam kissed Tommy's ear, slowly pulling away. They weren't this close since the AMAs. Adam liked it, but knew he shouldn't. He looked down at his feet and Tommy grabbed Adam's face and pulled him up to his own. He kissed him on the lips sweetly and shortly. They stood there, Adam's face in Tommy's hands, only inches away from each other. They looked at each other for a moment, just looking at one another before they kissed again. They were kissing and running their hands over their bodies. Feeling everything. Tommy pulled away.

"No one can know…" Breathed Tommy.

"I know."

Adam picked Tommy up off the counter and carried him to the bedroom, where he set him down on the bed. Adam was kissing, licking, and biting Tommy's neck. They started to remove their clothing, practically ripping it off of their bodies. When they were both naked, they started grinding together, never breaking the kiss. Adam slipped down Tommy's body, down to his cock. He started teasing it with his hand then his tongue. Finally he gave in to Tommy's cries and put his mouth on Tommy's shaft. He went fast and hard pulling and tugging at Tommy's hard member. Circling and tracing his tongue around the soft skin as he moved up and down. It didn't take Tommy long to come, spilling into Adam's willing throat, taking it all in. When Tommy was empty, Adam let go of his cock, letting it fall between his legs. He started to kiss Tommy's thighs, getting him hard again. Tommy reached for Adam's cock but couldn't get it because of the angle Adam was at. Adam saw what Tommy was trying to do so he moved his own body for Tommy's satisfaction. He grabbed hold of it and began to stroke Adam. When Tommy had had enough, he stopped.

"Something wrong?" Adam asked, a little out of breath.

"I want you." Tommy said, almost whispering.

"What do u want?" Adam asked, sinking his teeth into Tommy's shoulder.

"I want you!" Yelled Tommy as Adam bit him.

Adam flipped Tommy onto his belly before sucking on his fingers to get them wet and starting to tease Tommy's hole. He fingered him, forcing Tommy to moan loudly.

"Go-d- Adam…..noo—ww plee..ase. Adam!" Tommy was begging for it, wanting it more than anything else.

Adam drove his fingers into Tommy's ass, making him jump and yelp. With that, Adam took it slow but that's not what Tommy wanted, he bucked upward pushing Adam's fingers further in.

"Now Adam, please!"

Adam decided that if this was what Tommy wanted, he would give it to him. He removed his fingers and replaced them with his cock. Going in deep, Tommy took it all in, every throbbing inch of Adam's long, hard cock. Tommy didn't know what he was feeling, all he knew was that it was really, really good, and he wanted more. He bucked up against Adam as he thrusted, they continued in the same, lustful way until they both came. Adam climbed off of Tommy and fell beside him, taking in huge amounts of air. Tommy was still on his stomach with his face buried in the pillow.

"Did you like that?" Adam asked, smacking Tommy's exposed ass.

"Oh…oh yeah." Tommy slowly rolled over so he could look at Adam.

He rolled into Adam's arms and kissed him.

"Best night ever." Adam said.

"By far." Tommy replied with a giggle.

They stayed in each other's arms, locked together all night.

In the morning Tommy woke up…alone. He looked all around, Adam was nowhere in sight. He got up and walked to the bathroom – empty. He heard a noise come from the kitchen – must be Adam he thought. And sure enough, Adam was in the kitchen cooking. He made a huge spread. Eggs, bacon, pancakes, toast, and orange juice.

"I didn't know you could cook."

"Oh yeah. Just a little thing I picked up."

"Well I like it." Tommy said with a smile.

They ate a wondrous breakfast and had a fun time cleaning up. They didn't want to do anything too extravagant, so they just hung about the house. They watched a movie, ate some more, had a couple of tumbles, talked; all in all, it was a very simple day. Simple, yet, blissful. Each kiss was lingering even if it was short. It was a good day until Tommy got a phone call. It was about his place, it was done and he could move back in. He thought about staying with Adam, but since this had to be a secret, he knew it was best to leave.

That night, he and Adam packed most of his things and put them into Tommy's car. In the morning Tommy would be able to just pack his overnight bag and go. They wanted to make the separation as painless as possible. They didn't get much sleep that night, but morning came fast enough. The next morning, Adam and Tommy said their goodbyes. Tommy drove off, leaving Adam standing in the doorway, just like a movie ending. But unlike a movie, Tommy was coming back, in a couple of hours in fact. They didn't know what would await them now, but as long as they had each other they would be just fine.

There had been a lot of male bonding in a short amount of time…


	3. Can't Let You Go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Can't let you go  
> Can't let you go, oh
> 
> It feels like the dawn of the dead  
> Like bombs goin' off in my head

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Week's Chapter Is Based On The Song "Can't Let you Go" By Adam Lambert

For the next few months Adam and Tommy lived in secrecy, sneaking a kiss or a touch here and there. Making sure it didn't show on stage and around friends was hard, because they wanted each other so badly. Whenever they got a night alone it was a blessing, and they didn't waste a minute of it. Every kiss was full of passion, every touch was electric, and every look was full of promises. Soon it was too much for them, they had to let it out, but Adam was afraid to.

"Adam, come on. Please, what's the big deal? Huh? If they knew, it would be easier for us." Tommy said, pacing in front of Adam, who was sitting, looking down at his cup.

"The big deal is that it'll change everything. I don't want to drag you through all of this."

"All of what?" Tommy was getting red in his face. He wanted Adam to be honest with him, but most of all; he wanted to be with Adam.

"All of this life style." Adam got up so that he was towering over Tommy.

"Adam, it's better than having people talk about things that aren't true and making up stories. Right?"

"I…guess…" Adam was muttering under his breath.

Tommy tried to listen to what Adam was saying, but it was barely audible.

"Right?" Tommy was almost yelling.

"Yes! I guess so, but still."

"But still what?" Tommy pouted.

"I don't want you to get hurt from this." Adam reached out to take Tommy's hand in his own, and pulled him closer.

"I won't get hurt." Whispered Tommy.

"But you could and I don't want to take that chance."

Tommy looked at Adam; he knew what he was doing; trying to protect him from the cruel world. But he couldn't, and Tommy didn't care if he got hurt because he would have Adam.

"Adam, why can't you take a chance on this…on me?"

"Because I can't lose you."

Tommy had a tear welling up in his eye and couldn't hold it. He let that single tear fall. Adam bent down to kiss Tommy's lonesome tear away, but was immediately caught in a passionate kiss. They spent the whole day in bed, simply enjoying each other. Sometime in the afternoon Tommy's phone rang, causing both of the men to jump. Tommy picked up, it was Monte. He wanted Tommy to come over to play a new video game he got and knew Tommy wanted to play. After some "delays" Tommy was out. Adam didn't really care for video games and he needed the time to do some beautifying.

At Monte's house he and Tommy were having a blast. Tommy was winning, but only by a couple of games. Monte had just lost another game and threw the controller down like a child throwing a tantrum.

"Where did you learn to play like that?"

"Oh you pick it up here and there." Tommy said, laughing.

"So dude, what's up with you and Adam?"

Tommy sat there for a moment with a blank look on his face, not knowing what to say.

"You still in there?"

"Huh? Yeah what were you saying?"

"You and Adam."

"What about us?"

"Well the two of you have been together a lot."

"Oh we're just hanging out."

"Really?"

"Yeah…why?"

"No reason."

Tommy sat there and thought hard. Should I tell him? I mean it couldn't hurt…right? I mean Monte's a friend a friend, he wouldn't tell anyone. Isn't that what Adam's afraid of?

"Want the truth?"

"Yeah, that usually helps."

"Ok me…and Adam….we're…..together."

Tommy choked on the last word as it came out. He looked at Monte, trying to see what he was thinking.

"Really?" Monte asked in disbelief.

"Yeah, is that a problem?" Tommy asked a little bit louder.

He couldn't help that fact that he got defensive, it was in Tommy's nature.

"No, not at all."

"Ok good. You can't tell anyone."

"I know."

"OK."

The rest of their time together was sort of awkward. It was getting late but that didn't stop them, the only reason they stopped was because of Adam. He called, wanting Tommy to come home. Tommy didn't mind; he missed Adam, all of him. They spent the night in more of an embrace than anything else. Tommy felt kinda guilty for not letting Adam know that he told Monte about them. The next morning, Adam woke up alone. He went down to the kitchen to find Tommy sitting at the table staring at his empty cup.

"Baby, what's wrong?" Asked Adam, his voice full of worry.

"Nothing." Tommy wouldn't look up.

"Tell me. Please. I know something's wrong."

"I told Monte." Tommy admitted.

"Told Monte what?"

"About us. Not everything, just that we we're together."

Adam looked at Tommy for a bit, mouth slightly agape.

"Why?"

"Because I didn't think it would hurt."

"Tommy how could you do that to me?"

"What are you talking about?"

"I told you not to say anything!"

"Adam calm down, it's not a big deal, Monte is a friend, and he's not going to use it against us."

"Tommy that's not the point."

"Then exactly what is the point Adam?" Tommy stood up, hitting his fist on the table.

"That…that…"

"See you don't have a point."

"I do too."

"Well I haven't heard it."

"Don't get pissy with me, mister." They were in each other's faces, yelling, turning red, and almost panting.

"Lighten up, Adam."

"I am."

"Yeah right, you're so fucking tight I'm surprised I can still manage to get my dick into your ass anymore!"

Adam gasped, he had never been talked to that way before, and especially by someone he loved so much.

"Get out!" Adam screamed as tears began to well up.

"Don't mind if I do."

"Don't let the door hit you on the way out."

The door slammed and Adam sank into the closest chair and started to sob. For the next few days they didn't talk, they barely acknowledged each other. Adam couldn't take it anymore, he wanted Tommy back, he couldn't let him go. Couldn't let him go. Adam was supposed to be working on a new song and he had just found out what the song was going to be. It would be about Tommy, and hopefully this would bring him back.


	4. I Need You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You don't realize how much I need you.  
> Love you all the time and never leave you.  
> Please come on back to me.  
> I'm lonely as can be. I need you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Week's Chapter Is Based On The Song "I Need You" By The Beatles

Adam wrote his song and had the sheet music made. He took it over to Tommy's. Tommy was sitting on his couch staring plainly at the T.V. when Adam knocked.

"Come in."

"Hey." Adam said meekly as he opened the door.

"Hey, got the new song?"

"Yeah." Adam extended his arm out with the music. Tommy looked it over, realizing it was about him. He looked up at Adam then back at the paper he was holding. He tried to not show that he knew. Adam was staring at him, waiting for him to say something, but he didn't.

"You need anything else?" Tommy said looking at Adam, eyes widening a little.

"No…"

"Ok you know where the door is."

Adam left without another word; he thought that if Tommy had seen the song, he would certainly understand that Adam was sorry. But he didn't. Adam felt empty inside, he wanted his Glitterbaby back. He didn't like being without Tommy. When he had first met him, he couldn't help but to be drawn to Tommy. Now that he had had him, he wanted more. Their fight was stupid but Tommy didn't seem to want to fix things between them.

Tommy couldn't believe that he had just let the best thing in his life walk out the door. He was upset with Adam because he was over-reacting, but he couldn't help but to want him. He wanted to feel Adam's heart beating in rhythm with his. He wanted to feel his soft skin pressed up against his. Most of all, he wanted to feel Adam's long cock in his willing ass.

The song was recorded and released; but Adam and Tommy still didn't talk. The band was wondering what was up with them, so they asked Monte. But like a good friend he wouldn't give them up. He told them they had a falling out over something that he knew nothing about. He hoped that would hold them off until Adam and Tommy were able to straighten things out. He figured Adam would do something soon, but if he didn't….God only knows what would happen.

"Adam, can I talk to you for a sec?" Monte asked, walking toward Adam who was at his mirror trying out some make up ideas.

"Yeah, sure Monte what's on your mind?"

"You and Tommy…"

"What about us?" Adam paused at the mention of Tommy's name.

"Well I know about you two…."

"I know that you know!" Adam snapped

"Ok…why are you two upset with each other?"

Adam stopped doing his makeup and turned in his chair to look at Monte. "Because he told you about us and we got into a fight."

"Oh my God! Adam, that's stupid."

"I know it is, but still…"

"Get two queens in a room and let the high heels fly."

"Monte" Adam whined.

"Adam, you two need to make up."

"Yeah I know but Tommy doesn't want to talk to me."

"So?"

"So I can't do anything if he won't communicate."

"Adam, you need to at least try."

"Alright fine, but no promises."

Monte left with an undeserved feeling of accomplishment. Adam returned to his makeup, thinking about what Monte had said. He knew that he was right, he needed to try. Adam needed to do something more obvious, not just writing a song that Tommy apparently didn't get. He didn't have any idea of where to begin. But he had to start somewhere.

With the tour just weeks away, Adam didn't have much time to think of a plan to win back Tommy. But, every free moment that he had went straight to attempting to patch things up with Tommy. He went simple, sending flowers; didn't do a thing, Tommy looked at them then threw them away. He sent him a card; in the shredder. He didn't know what else to do. Adam could feel his heart breaking with every rejection. Adam gave up and just went into his room to cry. His tour was just days away, and he would be stuck with Tommy in an enclosed area for a long amount of time.

LATER THAT WEEK:

Adam put on his game face and hit the road. Today was the start of his Glam Nation Tour. He was excited, this was his first solo tour and he knew it would be great. He'd always wanted a tour and now here it was…if only he had someone to share it with. He and Tommy were still on the rocks, with no steadiness in sight. They went through ten shows before Adam got an idea.

He was going to show Tommy how much he meant to him, in front of everyone. He was going to kiss him on stage during Fever. If it worked out as planned, Tommy would take him back. He hoped this would work, if it didn't, he knew nothing would.

He went out there, grabbed Tommy, and kissed him. Everyone cheered loudly and when Adam looked back, Tommy was smiling. Adam continued the show, content with the fact that everything was finally going to be okay again.

After the show Tommy ran to Adam, jumping in his arms. They drew a little too much attention to themselves, so they left and went to the tour bus. The rest of the band and dancers went out to relax after all of the touring. Once they were alone, Tommy, once again, hugged Adam, pulling him in close.

"I'm so, so sorry."

"No, _I'm_ sorry."

They stayed in each other's embrace for what seemed like a lifetime. When they finally let go, they kissed so passionately that it seemed as if they were the only two people in the world. They knew no one would be back until the morning and even then, they wouldn't come in to Adam's room on the bus. They were safe now, and they were together. They spent the whole night entwined with each other. Never leaving the hold they had on one another.

Adam could never let Tommy go…


	5. Before He Cheats

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And maybe next time he'll think before he cheats

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Week's Chapter Is Based On The Song "Before He Cheats" By Carrie Underwood

Adam and Tommy had been together for several months. It was both heaven and hell. They loved being together, and with each day, they grew closer and closer. But, with each passing day it became harder and harder for them to hide their feelings towards each other. Only three people in the whole wide world knew; Adam, Tommy, and Monte. They had tried not to drag Monte into everything, but try as they may; he was right in the middle of the best kept secret the glam world had ever seen. They mostly used him as a cover so they could have some alone time. Other times they used him as a comforting friend.

Even though Adam and Tommy's relationship was tough, they knew it was the right thing for both of them, and that's all that matters. Each day that they woke up together was automatically a blessing, even if something went terribly wrong. This was because they both knew that as they lay in bed at night, they were in the arms of someone who loved them very much. And as long as that happened, everything would be all right, no matter what happened. Or at least that's what they thought. They lived a life of pure ecstasy, until Adam went to an American Idol reunion party. But I'm getting ahead of myself now aren't I?

It was a few months after the Glam Nation Tour had ended and Adam had gotten an invitation to a reunion for all of the past Idols. Everyone was going to be there; from season one all the way through nine, it was going to be huge. Adam was thrilled because he didn't get to really see anyone since they had parted to fulfill their various careers. Tommy was a little upset; his Adam was leaving, and God only knows when he'd be back. They whole time that Adam was trying to get ready; Tommy kept interrupting him. Taking off clothes, touching Adam, hiding his makeup. It didn't end; Adam was glad that he had decided to get ready earlier then needed. By the time he was ready, he was running late.

The party was a blast; everyone was talking and watching old AI videos. Adam was all over the party, but the one person he wanted to see wasn't there; Kris. He didn't come. How could be not be here? When the party started to die down a bit, Adam decided that it was pointless to say any longer. As he was about to leave a laugh broke the silence in Adam's brain. Kris walked into the room laughing and hugging various Idols, making his way slowly towards Adam.

"Hey Adam!" Kris said while catching him in a big bear hug.

"Hey Kris, I've missed you!"

"I've missed you too man!"

"It's been too long."

"Yeah it has." Kris said, smiling at Adam.

Since Kris had finally shown up, Adam decided to stay a while longer. He and Kris were inseparable, they were the last to leave, but they didn't go home. They hit a bar and ended up getting totally wasted. They staggered to a cab and headed to Kris's house. Katy wasn't home, she was visiting her parent's house, in fact; she had just left. Once they got to Kris's house they flopped themselves down onto the black, leather couch.

"That was fun." Adam said, looking over at Kris.

"Hell yeah it was!" Kris giggled.

"So what do you want to do?"

"Anything."

"Anything, anything?" Adam said with a wide eyed grin.

"Yeah…?" Kris said, eyeing Adam

Adam moved over so that he was right next to Kris. Kris shifted his body a little bit away from Adam. But Adam moved even closer to him.

"Dude, what are you doing?" asked Kris, appalled.

"Well you said anything. I just want to try something."

"Ok…?"

"Don't worry, I'm the master of pain and pleasure." Adam said with a grin.

They both laughed, then, Adam took Kris' face in his hands and kissed him. When he pulled away Kris wanted to follow him. He lingered in the air inches away from Adam's face. He leaned in and kissed Adam. One little, chaste kiss. As Kris gained courage, he took control and kissed Adam; only this time it wasn't quick, it was long and meaningful. They looked at each other for a moment before they kissed again, this time more fervently. Adam pushed Kris down onto the couch, kissing, licking and sucking on any visible part of Kris. He removed Kris's clothing, then his own, faster than u could say "fuck me sideways". He grabbed Kris, holding him close, and spread his legs. He wasn't going for sweet and easy, even though it was Kris's first time. He was in the mood, set on what he wanted. And what he wanted was Kris. He entered him in one quick movement, causing Kris to let out a shrieking moan. He pounded into him, one blow after another. He grabbed Kris's dick and started to tug. He began to make a rhythm with his hand and dick.

He continued working Kris for quite some time into the night. When they had their fill, they fell asleep, entangled in each other for what seemed like forever. It wasn't very late in the day that they decided to leave the warmth of the bed. It was a little awkward, them waking up together not knowing entirely what had happened the night before. Adam left, not really wanting to, but he knew it would be the best thing in this situation.


	6. No Sanctuary From Your Allure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Swamp sings over the bazaar  
> Snake bites aligning stars  
> I'm enraptured there is no cure  
> No sanctuary from your allure
> 
> I was lookin' for love all over  
> You're the hunter and I'm your prey  
> Now I'm lost in a love hangover  
> I try to leave but I have to stay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Week's Chapter Is Based On The Song "Voodoo" By Adam Lambert

Adam padded home, not rushing to get there. What would he say to Tommy? Would he even bother to tell him? Right now it was a one time thing…right? Yes, it was; it was just a moment of weakness, that's all. He'd always had a thing for Kris, and last night, it all came out. But he wouldn't let it happen again – he wouldn't, he could control himself. He pulled up in front of his house and spotted Tommy looking out the window. He walked inside and was immediately caught in a kiss.

"Oh baby, I thought something was wrong. I was gonna call, but my phone died. I was about to call the cops." Tommy snuggled into Adam's shoulder.

"I'm fine, I just had a little too much to drink, so I stayed at Kris' house." Tommy pulled away slowly.

"You stayed at Kris's house?" Tommy was backing away from Adam. He knew about Adam's feelings towards Kris; Adam had told him about them a long time ago.

Adam saw Tommy's face and knew he must be thinking that something had happened between them. He was right, but Adam couldn't bring himself to admit it.

"It was nothing baby." He took Tommy's face in his hands. "Promise." Then he kissed him. Tommy was drawn away from it.

"You taste different."

"I taste different?" Adam raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah…"

"It's probably from the booze." Adam said laughing.

"Yeah." They began kissing again.

"But still…"

"But still what?" Adam was afraid that Tommy was starting to catch on.

"I want you to taste like you." Tommy said with a smile that had something naughty hiding behind it.

Both of them ran for the bathroom, practically ripping their clothes off as they went. Adam got to the shower first and turned on the water. He was slightly bent over when Tommy came in; pushing his half hard cock against Adam's bare ass. Adam let out a sigh as he felt Tommy. He slowly came up, and turned, facing Tommy, giving him a wide-eyed smile. They kissed and somehow managed to get in the tub. For a while they were standing under the warm water, letting it beat down on them while they kissed long and passionately. Adam moved his hand from Tommy's hair and placed it between his legs, stroking Tommy's entire length. Tommy let out a low moan against Adam's lips and with every movement; he got louder and louder. Then Adam moved his hand to further part Tommy's legs, and slid one finger in his opening. He didn't have it in there long before he took it out and replaced it with his cock.

Their shower was mind-blowing; Tommy had never felt that way before. Adam was an amazing lover, but that shower wasn't like him at all. It was much, much, better. The next few days Adam stayed at home with Tommy, having sex non-stop. Tommy was enjoying all the sex, but that's all it was, its didn't have meaning like before. But Tommy's mind didn't stay to long on the subject, how could he; with Adam's tongue whirling around his ear, and other places…

Sometime during the week Tommy went out of town to a guitarist convention, leaving Adam lover-less. Adam thought it was kinda stupid, but Monte said it would be best if he went. So reluctantly, Tommy left; he would be gone for a week and a half. What was Adam supposed to do with himself? He didn't know; for the first part of the week he staggered around his place, aimlessly. Then by the middle of the week, he got a call. It was from a friend, a friend who would surely keep him occupied while his Glitterbaby was gone.

It was his one and only; Kris. He and Kris met up at Adam's place 'cause this time his "other half" was out of town. Kris just came over to talk but…that's not how it ended up. When they got in the same room together it was electric, they couldn't keep their hands off of each other. By the end of the day Adam was alone and Kris was at his own home. For the rest of the week they were together during the day, but separated by night. But family emergences can sometimes be good…

Kris felt kinda bad about it, but he wanted Adam more than anything, and if this were the time he could be with him, he would take it. When Kris got to Adam's house he ran to the door and knocked rapidly, not stopping until Adam opened the door. He pushed into Adam, their bodies becoming one. They waddled upstairs and into the bedroom. Kris pressed Adam into the bed, but because Adam was so much bigger than him, it was hard. Adam saw that Kris wanted control, so he gave it to him. He tried to move around easily, but Kris had always been with Katy, and she was a tiny girl. They were locked, lip-to-lip, chest-to-chest, and groin-to-groin. Then Kris started to grin against Adam, breaking the lock.

"Oh, fuck this! Why are we still wearing clothes?" Asked Adam breathlessly.

"I don't know baby, take it off, all of it." Kris moaned.

Kris was clawing at Adam's clothes, but they weren't budging. He finally got aggravated enough and ripped Adam's clothes off. Then he removed his own faster than lightening hitting the ground.

"Wow baby, you want this huh?" Adam asked out of breath

"More than anything." Kris answered, kissing Adam's chest.

He wasn't letting Adam do anything; he was denied this kind of pleasure for far too long. For the past week all they did were quickies, and if they did more; it didn't last long. He never got to stay long, but tonight would be different, tonight he got to stay, and tonight he got to be with Adam, unlike before.

Kris had moved down to Adam's shaft and instead of teasing and playing with it, he dived right in. Taking in Adam's long, thick and hard self, almost gagging on it. But he didn't care; he had had enough of the games. Soon he got bored of just sucking, he wanted Adam. He was acting like a crazy person, but when your drug, your sweet, intoxicating, drug is right in front of you…there's nothing in the world you want more. He spread Adam apart, opening him up so he could shove his rock hard dick into him. Adam was lying there like a piece of meat, taking it all in. He wanted more than just sex with Kris but this wasn't just sex, yet at the same time, it wasn't love making. It was raw, full of meaning, untamed, rough, and primal. Kris was making Adam's body and mind run wild. His body had never gone through this before; and his mind was running loose with the ideas of what Kris might do next. But he never did anything Adam thought he would. They pounded together, skin on skin, hip-hitting hip, tongues entwined. Then without any warning, both men came harder and more intense than ever before. Kris coated the inside of Adam, making him slick and easier to move in and out of. Adam covered himself and Kris with his warm cum, making friction with their bodies. Kris fell onto Adam, making a squish sound when his body made contact with the cum. He stayed inside of Adam and they fell asleep kissing.

The next morning was rough; they had to pull themselves apart. It did not go smoothly. Their skin was red when they were finally separated. They showered and went downstairs for food. They ate like crazy, when they were done there was hardly anything left in the fridge. The morning was going good, well, besides the pulling apart. But like it's said, as soon as you start to enjoy yourself, it has to end. Kris had gotten a call from Katy. She was coming home; everything was fine with the family, just an over-reaction.

"Well this was fun." Adam said, sighing as Kris gathered up his stuff.

"Yeah it was, too bad we can't do it anymore."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean Katy's on her way back, Tommy will be home; what tomorrow?"

"Yeah so what? We could keep it a secret." Adam said, sliding a finger up and down Kris' arm.

"No, we can't."

"Why not?"

"Because, whenever we've gotten together one of us has been alone."

"There's a thing called a hotel you know?"

"Yeah I know, but come on, really?" Kris said looking up at Adam.

"You're right, its kinda…I don't know." Adam said, making a face.

"Ok so I'll call you, promise, who knows, maybe we'll find a way."

"Yeah, maybe." Both men giggled and kissed goodbye.

Kris left, but it wasn't the end, not at all. In fact, it was the beginning of something new. What this would bring, who knows, all there is to know is that something good and bad comes out of everything. May it be big or small amounts; hopefully big in the good and small in the bad.


	7. What's Going On?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Talk to me, so you can see  
> Oh, what's going on

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Week's Chapter Is Based On The Song "What's Going On" By Marvin Gaye

When Tommy got home Adam did not let him go. He was always glued to some part of Tommy at all times. Tommy didn't mind; he liked being close to Adam, but there was something unsettling about it. Something unsettling about everything, but Adam never gave Tommy time to dwell on any of those thoughts, he kept him quite…occupied. Tommy was somewhat worried because Adam had done this to him before but nothing bad had come from it; so why was he worried? That's what Tommy told himself over and over again. He thought that Adam might want to take their relationship to the next level and that's why he was being this way, but there was still something there. He couldn't put his finger on it, but he knew something was wrong.

It was a gray and gloomy Sunday afternoon, when there was a knock on the door. Adam looked around; Tommy wasn't there to get the door, so he got up and shuffled across the apartment. It was Kris, he was all smiles but Adam was anything but.

"Hey Adam." Kris was grinning from ear to ear.

"Kris…what are…what are you doing here?" Adam couldn't talk; he never thought that Kris would show up when Tommy was home.

"I was in the area and decided to drop by."

"In the area? Kris, you live two hours away."

"So, I can't come see my favorite person in the whole wide world?"

"I…I…Tommy's home." Adam said looking over his shoulder.

"Ok…thanks for the update." Kris said laughing a little.

"Kris." Adam hissed "You know what I mean."

"I know. I am not going to do anything, scouts honor." He said, holding up three fingers laughing.

"Ok fine, come in." Adam moved away from the door, letting Kris in.

Tommy came around the corner as Kris walked in. Tommy stopped, eyeing Kris up and down, wondering why he was here. Even though it was Adam's house, and he could have whoever he wanted over, Tommy felt a bit betrayed. This was his and Adam's special place where they could be together…alone. It was fine that Kris was here, it's not like they were doing anything, and it doesn't matter if Tommy was going to do something with Adam. Nope, it didn't matter cause' Adam was happy, and that's all that mattered.

They stayed in and watched movie after movie. It was late when something finally broke the boring circle they were in. It was Kris's phone ringing, it was Katy. She was going to stay the night at a friend's house because she was going through some things, blah, blah, blah. So Kris ended up staying with Adam, for no reason. But because Adam and Tommy's relationship was secret; Tommy had to leave and go to his own house.

"But Adam, can't I stay? We could call it a guy's night."

"Yeah, but, ok then, when we go to bed what are we going to do?" He said lifting an eyebrow.

"Oh yeah huh?"

"Yeah." Adam said, turning Tommy around so he faced the door.

"But why can't Kris go home? There's nothing wrong with his house, the only thing is that his wife isn't there."

"He doesn't want to be alone; I think they are having problems."

"Ohh see, you didn't say that. Ok fine, I'll go home but I'm gonna give it to you like never before for doing this to me." He said, giving a devilish smile.

"I hope so." Adam teased back, slightly grabbing Tommy's ass.

Adam turned around to find Kris glaring at him intently. Looking him up and down, practically burning a hole in Adam's body.

"Kris?"

"Yeah glitters? You got some shine for me?" Kris said, smacking Adam's ass.

"Kris, what has gotten into you?" Adam asked, jumping back.

"Nothing." Kris let out a sigh.

"What's wrong Krissifer?" Adam said, extending a hand to Kris's shoulder.

"I just…I wanted." Kris stopped and looked at Adam. Then he kissed him.

"You wanted to kiss me?"

"No, well yeah, but that's not what I was trying to say."

"What were you trying to say?" He asked, stroking Kris's hair.

"I want to be with you and I thought that you might not."

Adam gazed at Kris with a look of pure astonishment.

"You never called back; I thought I might not have been good enough for you."

"Oh Krissy." Adam said, pouting and hugging him. "You are so good enough for me. I didn't call you because I was with Tommy and I love him."

"Do you love me?"

"In a way…yes."

"But not like you love Tommy…"

"Not right now, I'm sorry."

"But it could be, maybe, right?" Kris looked up, still clinging to Adam.

"Yeah, maybe."

"Anything I can do to help?" Kris asked, getting a naughty look on his face.

"Maybe one or two things."Adam giggled into Kris's throat.

Kris maneuvered Adam to the couch, forcing him down. He pinned Adam down and climbed on top of him. He got his mouth close to Adam's ear and whispered,

"I could eat a peach for hours, if I were to send you flowers where would I…no wait, let me rephrased that. If I were to let you suck my tongue would you be grateful?"

Adam giggled low in his throat. "Kris, I don't have a peach."

"I know, but I know how much you like that movie." Kris said, kissing and biting on Adam's bottom lip.

Kris slowly stuck his tongue out and Adam took it and greedily began to suck. He moved his hand down between Kris's legs and pulled down the zipper. He opened them and started to stroke Kris's cock, making a rhythm with his mouth and hand. After awhile he let go of Kris all together.

"Baby, is something wrong?" Kris asked, looking at Adam, panting a little.

"I don't want to do it down here." He said, looking around the living room.

"Oh ok." Kris said, looking around then getting up and taking Adam's hand, he led him up to the bedroom.

Once the door slammed, Adam twirled Kris around and looked deep into his eyes. He then kissed him roughly yet sweetly on the lips. When he pulled away Kris' lips were swollen and a bright pink. Adam nudged Kris over to the bed and slowly put him down. He crawled next to Kris and lay down beside him. He let his hand explore every inch of Kris' body, slightly pinching the nipples. Then going down to his cock, he took his finger and rubbed it back and forth over the opening. Then, replacing his finger with his tongue, he went through the process again, causing Kris' body to shiver and shake. Adam moved up so that their cocks were grinding together and he and Kris could make out. He shoved his tongue down Kris' throat; making him gag a little. He spread Kris' legs and pressed a finger to his opening, circling it. This made Kris moan low and deep. He closed his eyes; taking a deep breath, when he let it out it traveled over to Adam's cock, making him even harder. He had to get inside of Kris but he didn't want to hurt him. He couldn't hurt him, and he wasn't going to, as long as he could help it. He tried to stretch him with his fingers but Kris kept pushing back onto them. Adam could tell that Kris wanted this, but something was holding Adam back from diving right into it. But in a matter of time he gave into the cries of Kris and the wanting that was in him. He entered Kris in one swift movement and stayed there. Hovering over Kris, Adam pulled out slowly then seeing Kris's face he stopped. But Kris lifted up his hips thrusting at Adam to go on. That night was sweeter than most, yet filled with separation. Like at any moment everything would end, and it would. But right now it was strong and alive. And hopefully it would be that way for awhile.

They woke up the next morning, very early. The sun was peeking through the curtain and fell upon Kris; Adam couldn't help but sigh, it was a content sigh, a sigh that had to be done to express ones feelings. Kris looked so beautiful; he leaned over and kissed him, causing Kris to stir "Good morning" Adam said with smile. "Mhmm" Adam laughed a sweet and light laugh at Kris's response. Adam looked at his hand, it was still wet from last night's escapade, Kris saw this and reached for Adam's hand, he took in each finger slowly, one at a time and began to suck. He sucked slow and longingly, wanting more. Adam couldn't help let out a giggle watching this man, this man that he had shared so much with sucking his fingers as though he never had or as if he never would again. Adam stared at Kris and Kris stared back, letting go of Adam's fingers. Kris opened his mouth but shut it before he could say it anything. Adam was about to say something when the door opened and they heard a gasp…


	8. In The Aftermath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Have you lost your way?   
> Livin' in the shadow of the messes that you made   
> And so it goes   
> Everything inside your circle starts to overflow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Week's Chapter Is Based On The Song "Aftermath" By Adam Lambert

The gasp they heard was Tommy, he stood there; hand on the knob, mouth wide open. Adam and Kris looked at each other, then at Tommy, eyes wide. No one said anything for a long time; they just stared at each other. The first one to speak was Adam.

"Tommy, it's not..." He said while wrapping a sheet around him; getting up.

"It's not what, Adam?" Tommy asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I…we just…I" Adam looked at Kris for some help, but all he got was a blank stare.

When Adam turned around he saw Tommy leaving, storming out of the room. He followed after him with Kris in tow. But by the time he got down stairs Tommy was gone. Adam stood still looking at the door, tears welling up in his eyes. Kris walked over to Adam and placed a hand on his shoulder. Adam shrugged him off and turned to look at him. His bottom lip shook a little as tears ran down his face.

"Oh baby, I'm sorry, I never thought this would happen."

"Yeah, we didn't think." Adam said hoarsely.

"Adam." Kris said as Adam turned to leave.

Adam called Tommy time and time again, but he never answered. Kris went home to Katy; feeling empty and hurt. Tommy spent his days ignoring Adam's calls and drinking away the pain. Adam decided that if Tommy wouldn't pick up he would just have to go and see him. And that's what he did. He built up enough courage and drove himself to Tommy's house. When he got there he didn't know what he was going to do, or how to handle it, but he would, one way or another. When Tommy opened the door Adam was taken back at his appearance. Tommy's eyes were red and puffy, his hair disarray, and his clothes displaced.

"What do you want?" Tommy said, choking a little on the words.

"I wanted to talk."

"Come in."

"Tommy, I'm sorry, I never wanted to hurt you."

"Then why did you do it?"

"I…I…I got overwhelmed."

"Overwhelmed by what?"

"By having Kris…"

"Was it better than having me?" Tommy looked up at Adam, searching for some light.

"No…" Adam said, letting the word roll off his tongue. It was only half true. The first time he and Kris were together was better than Tommy, but not any time after that.

"Was it more than one time?"

"Yes." Adam looked down at his feet, unable to look Tommy in the eye.

"Adam, why does this happen to us?"

"Why does what happen to us?"

"We let all kinds of things come between us and we break up and this is like the first time it's been something big."

"Oh…yeah, I never meant for this to happen, you have to know that."

"I do."

"You do?" Adam asked, puzzled.

"I know that you never planned your little fun time with Kris to be found out. Because you wanted it to go on instead of me!"

"That's not true!" Adam said, getting worried that Tommy was getting this all wrong.

"Ok then, what is it?" Tommy asked, getting defensive. Adam didn't say anything, he didn't know what to say.

"Is it that you like him better than me? His dick is bigger than mine? He does something better than I can?"

"No, no, no!" Adam said, pleading with Tommy.

"Then what is it?"

"I just wanted him!" Adam said out of breath.

"You wanted him?" Tommy said, backing up, looking even more hurt.

"I just…I'd been so close to him but never got anything and then a moment opened up and I took it. It was supposed to be a one-time thing, but then one thing lead to another…"

"But you were still with me…still having sex with me while being with him."

"I know, I know." Adam chanted as he walked closer to Tommy. He reached for him but Tommy backed away, shaking his head.

"You…"Tommy wiped away a tear. "You said you loved me. You said nothing would every break us up again. You said you couldn't let me go. You wrote a fucking song about it." Tommy was full on crying now.

"I know." Adam said, tears forming in his eyes.

"Is that all you know how to say, I know?" Tommy asked, sitting down before he fainted.

"No, I just don't know what to say to you."

"Tell me the truth."

"I'm trying."

"Pick."

"Pick what?"

"Pick between me and Kris!" Tommy said, getting up from the couch.

"I can't!"

"Why not?"

"Because both of you mean so much to me."

"Someone has to mean more to you."

"No."

"Fine." Tommy said, raging. He grabbed Adam and kissed him roughly on the lips, with no mercy.

"Tommy, what are you doing?" Adam asked, breaking the kiss.

"Showing you not to mess with what you had."

Tommy had a strange look in his eyes and it frightened Adam. He held Adam tightly against his body, making out with him. Adam tried to pull away many times, but couldn't. Tommy was small, yet he was overpowering Adam; it didn't make sense. He pushed Adam into the bedroom and slammed the door. He threw him onto the bed and pinned him. He had some trouble holding Adam down while he got his handcuffs out of the nightstand. Once he got them, he cuffed Adam to the top headboard. It made things easier on Tommy, now he could get down to business. He pushed Adam's shirt up, he should have taken it off first, but this was fine. He pulled down Adam's briefs with his pants and tossed them aside. He went between Adam's legs, spreading him wide, and placed a finger at Adam's opening. Tommy moved it in and out for awhile, causing Adam to moan. But that wasn't enough for Tommy, he wanted Adam begging and pleading with him. He removed his finger and pressed the tip of his cock at the opening. He shot Adam a devilish grin, which sent a tremor through Adam's body. Tommy entered with one fast and hard act, making Adam shriek. He pounded into him again and again; with each time Adam screamed louder and louder.

"Tell me how much you like it!" Tommy yelled, towering over a helpless Adam.

"I, ahhhh, I like it." Adam could barely talk, it hurt so badly. There was no pleasure to this, it was all pain. Adam knew Tommy would let him go if he gave in, so he played along. Tommy pounded even harder into Adam when he said he liked it. He was moments away from coming.

"Say my name, say it!" Tommy said in a high pitched voice.

"Tom…Tommmy!" Adam screamed as his ass was pinched.

Tommy came spilling into Adam, then he removed himself when he was spent. He uncuffed Adam and fell beside him. Adam waited for Tommy to fall asleep and left. He couldn't believe what had just happened, it broke his heart to think that someone he loved so much could think so little of him and hurt him like Tommy did. When Tommy woke up he was ticked off that Adam had left. He couldn't believe it. He wasn't thinking when he picked up the phone and dialed Katy.

"Hello Katy Allen." Said a soft voice.

"Hey Katy, it's Tommy, Adam's bass player, I don't know if you remember me."

"Oh, yeah... hey Tommy. What can I do for you?"

"Well I have something to tell you."

"Ok, about what?"

"About Kris and Adam."

"Oh, are they ok? Cause Kris came home the other day from being over there and something seems off."

"Yeah off is right." Tommy said, harshly laughing into the phone.

"Ok? Tommy what's going on?"

"Well….I don't know how to tell you this."

"Just tell me, I can handle it."

"Ok, Adam and Kris had an affair…"

There was nothing for what seemed like a long time Tommy almost thought she hung up when she spoke,

"Are you sure?"

"I walked in on them."

Tommy heard a door thud in the back ground.

"Thank you Tommy for telling me this." The line went dead.

Katy turned to Kris who just walked in.

"Hey babe." Kris said walking to Katy "Something wrong?"

"Yeah. That was Tommy."

"Oh?" Kris said trying to hide the uneasiness in his voice.

"Yeah, and he said you and Adam had an affair." She said with a little laugh.

"What? That's crazy, me and Adam? He said that ha. Wow" Kris said, faking a laugh, he was outraged that Tommy had told.

"It is crazy. But I can believe it, and I do."

"Oh…"

"Is it true?"

"Yes."

Katy's eyes teared up instantly. Kris couldn't find the words to say.

"Get out." Katy said, looking at Kris

"Katy." Kris pleaded.

"Get out!" She shrieked.

Kris ran out of the house without saying anything more. He drove to Adam's house, hoping he'd know what to do. The door of Adam's house opened after the second knock.

"Tommy?" Adam said, out of breath like he ran a mile to the door.

"No, it's Kris."

"Oh." Adam said pouting. He spun around and left the door open with Kris standing there.

"Can I come in?'

"Yeah, why not."

Kris went inside and walked over to Adam who was sitting on the couch with a pint of ice cream.

"Tommy told Katy about us and she threw me out." Kris said super fast so he could get it out before he was stopped.

"Good."

"Can I stay here?"

"No."

"Why not?"

Adam put down his ice cream and looked at Kris.

"Because I lost the person I love the most because you couldn't keep it in your pants."

"You allowed it."

Adam just glared at Kris, he wasn't really mad at him he was just hurt.

"Ok fine, I'll go somewhere else." Kris said, getting up off the couch.

"No, its ok, you can stay."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Only for tonight."

"Ok."

"And you're on the couch."

"That's fine."

That night Kris was on the couch, unable to sleep but a couple of rooms over Adam had the same problem. He didn't like sleeping alone and he didn't like sleeping alone when something so tempting was in the other room. Adam didn't know what was wrong with him. He loved Tommy more then he'd ever loved anyone before. But yet Kris was so invigorating and he wanted him. It's like Kris had some kind of magnet in him, that no matter what, you wanted to be near him. But Tommy, oh, Tommy, he was something special, he made everyday wonderful and you never wanted the day to end.

Adam's mind was full and overflowing and he wasn't getting to sleep. Somehow or another Kris had managed to fall asleep but it wasn't a full on sleep, more like a cat nap. Adam finally got to sleep after hours of tossing and turning. He went to sleep, drifting off into his own world where he could have both his men.


	9. Silly Ménage à trois

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We'll never get too far   
> Just you, me and the bar   
> Silly menage a trois, sometimes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Week's Chapter Is Based On The Song "Fever" By Adam Lambert

Adam's P.O.V  
\------------

I awoke sometime in the early morning to a noise downstairs. Thud, thud, bang…..silence. It was a strange noise, it was nothing like I have heard before. I rolled out of bed and head downstairs to investigate. When I get to the bottom stair I look around and see Kris fumbling around in the kitchen. I walk in slowly, looking around, taking in my surroundings. For some reason everything looks different and feels different, but its my house and my things. But I lose my train of thought by Kris dropping a pan.

"Oh I'm sorry Adam, did I wake you?" Kris asks, holding a pan awkwardly.

"Uh…No I was up but the noise brought me down." I said, eyeing Kris up and down. He's in pajamas, his hair is messy and he looks disoriented. Kris is wandering aimlessly around, now I have to intervene.

"Kris, what are you doing?"

"I'm making you breakfast for letting me stay here last night, even though I didn't deserve it."

"Oh…it was nothing. You don't have to cook, Kris."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah." I say with a crooked smile.

"Ok good, 'cause I don't know what I'm doing."

Kris says laughing.

Soon we are both laughing and looking at the kitchen and what Kris has done to it. After we wind down. we start to clean up. We are finishing up and there's a knock on the door; I leave the kitchen to answer it. When I open it the little smile I had is now gone, standing before me at the door is Tommy. We don't say anything, I just move and he walks in. When I turn to look at him I'm enveloped in an embrace and kiss. I'm lost in the kiss, the only thing that can break it is the sound that comes from the kitchen. When Tommy lets me go I see Kris standing by us. I'm about to speak when Kris and Tommy kiss; that stops me dead on. I watch intensely as they go at it, then I see tongue. I must have let out a sound. 'cause at that moment they stopped and looked at me.

"What's wrong Adam?" Tommy says, walking over to me.

"What was that?" I ask, taken back at the fact that everything seems fine.

"There's nothing wrong with it." Kris chimes in.

I open my mouth but nothing comes out. My mouth is still open, but not empty as Tommy fills it with his tongue. He holds me close to him, then I feel another body. Kris had joined us and he starts nibbling my neck and ears. Soon I feel my shirt being pushed up and my jeans being pulled down. At first I was taken aback by the turn of events, but I'm enjoying it too much to let that stop me. I let them manhandle me and watch them do it to each other. Once when are all naked, I'm shoved against the wall, feeling lips and teeth all over my body. I feel nails dig into my ass cheeks and tongues running up and down my aching cock. I put my hands in their hair, encouraging them to do more. They graciously do so. First. Tommy. then Kris. both taking me in, every single inch. No one was talking. the only sound was my moaning,and the sound they made from sucking.

It felt so good to have both of my lovers working their magic on me. I'm so close to coming it's unreal. They can feel it, I know they can. They seem able to read my mind, because at that moment, they let go. They stood up and lead me to the kitchen. I was at their mercy, and loving every minute of it.

When we got to the kitchen they laid me out on the kitchen table. I had no clue what they were doing or what they were going to do. I'm left alone, spread eagle, on the cold table while they rooted around in the fridge. Kris was the first one back, and with him was a can of whipped cream and a pint of ice cream. He walked around me, then spread my legs and placed a dab of whipped cream on the head of my dick. He moved up my body; leaving a trail of whipped cream up to my mouth, where I get a taste. Kris then sits down by me and starts to eat ice cream. Teasing me with it and only giving me tiny tastes. Every now and then he takes a finger to the whip cream but always leaving the bit on my dick.

Tommy is watching as he indulges in some cake. Soon, its too much for him, he gets up and comes over, placing his cake on my stomach. They are both snacking on me, not always getting only food. I start to lose it, the feeling is like nothing I've ever felt before. The biggest thing is the whipped cream, still on my dick. I kept looking at it, and the one time I did, Tommy caught me. He moved over to it and looked me in the eye.

"Baby, want me to take care of that for you?" He said with a pleasured grin.

All I could do is nod my head because Kris took his tongue oh so close to my cock. My mind was going wild, I wanted them to do it already, I also wanted more. I was about to speak when I felt pressure on my cock. Tommy wasn't biting m,e so much as dragging his teeth over it. I let out a high pitched moan. Tommy shot Kris a look that said, your move. Kris got on top of me, putting his cock in my mouth. I took it and began to suck wildly. Kris moaned and giggled, which made Tommy giggle in his throat. I was once again ready to come, and I could tell Kris getting there, but they stopped again. It's like they don't want me to come, and they don't want to come. Maybe they have something bigger planned for me and that's why. But I don't really care, 'cause at that moment, they were lifting me off the table.

We went up stairs and into the bathroom. We were covered in food. I don't know how Tommy and Kris got food on them, but somehow they did. Kris turned on the water while Tommy and I kissed. Then, Kris joined in. We managed to get into the shower without breaking our kiss. We were touching each other everywhere, all we had done so far was touch, I want to fuck and get fucked.

"Guys, come on, please." I beg.

"What do you want?" Tommy asked, licking me.

"I…want…I want you to the two of you to fuck me…" I moan.

Tommy backed me up against the wall and dove a finger into me. Then Kris came over to us, he was putting a finger in Tommy. I grunt, pressing down on Tommy's finger. Why wont they give me more? What are they doing? Then, without warning, Tommy removed his finger and inserted his dick. I moaned loudly, it felt so fucking good. Tommy kissed me and moaned against my lips. I saw over his shoulder that Kris had just entered him as well. We were moving in this rhythm, we had to make sure that everyone getting pleasured.

As soon and as quickly as it started, it ended. I didn't want it to end, but they pulled me out of the shower and dried me off. Every time I tried to get control, they over powered me.

"You know what? Kris, I'm going to fuck you until you faint. And Tommy, I'm going to fuck you until your stupid. When I'm done with the two of you, you're going to be faint and be stupid." I stated plainly.

They looked at each other, then at me.

"You mean that?" Kris asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes." I hissed, finally losing their hold.

"Then do it." Tommy said, backing off while Kris groped him. I grabbed them both and pulled them over to the bed, pushing them down. They were both on their backs and I crawled in between them. Kissing them everywhere, it's pure bliss. But I want to live up to my promise and I've wanted them all day. I decide to do Tommy first, since he gave a little in the shower. I don't do anything to ready him; he doesn't need it. I go all in, fast and hard. Tommy screaming out what sounds like a dieing shriek. I stop, look at Tommy, then at Kris who was sitting next to us.

"No, Adam go on." Tommy pants heavily. I take a minute before I continue. The whole time I'm in Tommy, Kris is just sitting there, jerking off. With every move I make Tommy gets harder and harder. I move my one hand from his hip and place it on Kris' cock and make a rhythm. We both come, I fill him as he coats my hand and his chest in cum. After I'm spent I pull out and fall beside him, putting myself between him and Kris once again. I don't get a minute of rest before Kris is pulling me on top of him. I wasn't hard yet, but he didn't care, we were just kissing until I got there again. I kept looking over at Tommy who was unmoving and silent. He was still breathing, but his eyes were closed I thought he might have been sleeping; then he looked at me and gave a smile that went from ear to ear. Seeing that gets me half hard. Then, Kris grinds his rock hard dick against me. I'm hard now, and oh God do I want Kris. I push up a leg, making his opening easier to access. I dive in, causing Kris to scream louder than Tommy. I gave Kris the same treatment I gave Tommy, only a little deeper. Once again, I was spent and fell between them. We lay there motionless for what seems like forever.

"So…Tommy." I pant while I look over at him. "Are you stupid?"

"Huh? Where am I?" He jokes, laughing.

"Good. Kris?" I ask and he fakes fainting.

"Good boys." I say. stroking their hair.

I never want this to end. this feeling of being satisfied. and the feeling of complete contentment.

Adam woke up panting, blinking his eyes. That was the most exciting and riveting dream he ever had. He got up and walked down stairs. Kris was asleep on his couch, snoring a little, but other wise, everything was quite. Then there was a knock on the door; Kris stirs, sitting up, rubbing his eyes. I open the door and there stands Tommy.

Déjà vu anyone?


	10. I Just Wanna Be With You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I just wanna be with you  
> 'Cause living is so hard to do  
> When all I know is trapped inside your eyes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Week's Chapter Is Based On The Song "Time For Miracles" By Adam Lambert

As Tommy walked in Adam can't help but to recall last night's dream. Adam just stares and Tommy and Kris; eyes wide, for what seems like forever. Eventually, Tommy decided to cut some of the tension that hung in the air. Adam had never been so relieved.

"What is he doing here?" Tommy hisses.

"He spent the night." Adam says carefully as Kris gets up and walks over to where Adam and Tommy are.

"Why?"

"Cause you got me kicked out of my own house!" Kris hollered at Tommy, inches away from his face.

"You deserved it!" spat Tommy.

Kris lunged at Tommy, but Adam stopped him, jumping between the two. It wasn't too hard to restrain Kris.

"Stop it! Both of you!" Adam commanded.

They both stared at Adam with menacing eyes. Adam pointed towards the couch, motioning for them to sit down.

"Play nice."

"Why should I?" Kris snarled.

"Because fighting won't solve anything."

"You sure about that?" Tommy said, tensing up.

"Yes." Adam said, looking at them both, searching for any sign that one of them was going to make a move.

"Adam, did you ever pick?" Asked Tommy.

"Uh…." Adam didn't know how to answer that.

"Wait, what? You asked him to chose?" Kris asked, a look of pure pain in his eyes.

"Yeah, 'cause he needs to."

"No, he doesn't, and besides, who says he would choose you?" Adam's jaw dropped when Kris said that. Tommy just snorted and stood stock-still.

Then, before Adam could think; Tommy was jumping on Kris, pulling his hair, and hitting him. Kris fought back vehemently. Soon they were on the ground, switching back and forth as to who was on top. All Adam could do was watch in awe, he didn't want to get between it, and yelling at them wasn't working. They didn't last long; Tommy pinned Kris down and made him forefit.

"You two done?" Adam asked as they stood up, rearranging themselves.

"Yes." They said in unison.

"But, you still have to pick." Tommy stated.

Tommy and Kris turned to Adam, arms crossed across their chest, waiting. Adam was speechless; he couldn't pick and that dream did not help at all. He opened and shut his mouth so many times that Tommy and Kris started to look worried. He simply shook his head and shrugged. Tommy let out a sigh and rubbed the back of his neck.

"Adam, you have to. It's the only thing that's going to solve this." Tommy said with Kris nodding his head in agreement.

"Come on guys…" Adam whined.

"No, Adam, pick." Demanded Tommy.

"I can't."

"You have to. You can't have both of us." Kris said plainly.

"Why not?" Adam asked, pouting.

"Because its unfair to us, that's why!" Tommy said standing up.

"What if we are all friends first, then we can go from there?" Asked Adam, looking hopeful.

"No." They said together.

"Oh…." Adam whispered, looking at his feet.

"You know what? I can't do this. I've done a lot for you Adam, I've gone through a lot for you. And if you can't pick between me and a fling, then I have nothing more to say to you." Tommy said, beginning to cry.

Before anyone could say anything Tommy stormed out of the house; leaving Adam and Kris alone. They looked at each other for a while before Kris got up and left. Adam sat all alone in his big empty house thinking about all that had gone on. He loved them both, but the one person he wanted the most was Tommy. He couldn't believe he had let him go so many times because of Kris. Kris was his little fantasy fun and casual fuck, but nothing long term. Tommy was his sweet, sweet Glitterbaby, and he always would be. They had gone through so much together, it seemed like a waste to let this come between them. Adam wanted to be with Tommy forever, if he would have him. After everything that had gone on Adam wasn't sure Tommy would want him anymore. And he couldn't blame him either. But Tommy wanted him to pick between him and Kris, so, maybe if he finally told him how he felt he would come back. That was Adam's plan; go tell Tommy he wanted him more than Kris.

He drove over to see Tommy as fast as his little car would take him. He was in luck; no traffic, all the lights were green, it was like the universe wanted them to be together. When Tommy opened the door, Adam grabbed him and said, "I pick you, I always have." Tommy started to cry immediately, then Adam started to do the same. They sobbed together in each others arms; never letting go, nor ever wanting to.


	11. Would You Be M-Mine?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There he goes   
> My baby walks so slow   
> Sexual tic-tac-toe   
> Yeah I know we both know It isn't time, no   
> But could you be m-mine?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Week's Chapter Is Based On The Song "Fever" By Adam Lambert

The next day, Adam and Tommy announced their relationship to their family and friends. They took it well, they all kind of already knew, but them saying it themselves was much better. Adam was going to tell the world on his next interview, which was coming up sooner then expected. Adam on Tommy were floating on air, happy that they were finally together, happy that everyone was okay with it, happy that everything worked out alright. Once everyone knew, things seemed different for Adam and Tommy, like a weight was lifted from their chest. Now they could be together and have nothing get between them. The only downside to it was all the haters, but as long as Adam had Tommy, and Tommy had Adam, they would make it through anything thrown at them. Tommy decided to move in with Adam since Adam's house was way bigger then his. The move seemed to take forever. Tommy didn't have a lot of things but, they had to make room for everything. After a couple of months, everything was settled and they were all moved in. Life was good, simple, and sweet. Of course they continued their music, it seemed to be better now that everything was out in the open. The fans certainly enjoyed it all. The extra kisses and touches during the songs. Adam was writing more and more songs about Tommy. Some sweet and meaningful others….well others…others made "For Your Entertainment" and "Fever" look tame. Everything was working perfectly for them, it almost didn't seem real. But with every kiss, every touch ,and every I love you, they knew it was real. Things seemed fine but Tommy wanted a little more. He wanted to know that Adam was his and vice versa. He wanted to get married. Adam was fine with that, he wanted it too, but, he wasn't sure if they should. He was afraid of what it might do to Tommy. Somehow he felt it might trap them. He talked to Tommy about it to clear the air.

"You don't think you'll change your mind or anything?" Adam asked, taking Tommy's hand.

"No, I know what I want and I'm not going to change my mind."

"You 100% sure?"

"Yes Adam, 100% sure."

Adam stared at Tommy for a long moment then got down on one knee.

"Thomas Joseph Ratliff, I've loved you for quite awhile now and after all the things we've been through, I think it is time like you said. We are ready and so I think this is right. Will you marry me?"

He pulled out a small box and opened it, revealing a ring. It was sliver and had a single clear stone set in it. Tommy almost cried right then and there. He sunk down to Adam's level, looking at him, then the ring.

"If you had doubts… how did you.."

"I wanted to, but I wasn't sure, it was in case…" Adam said, flashing that smile that gave Tommy weak knees. He couldn't speak, he couldn't think, everything was coming true and everything was perfect. All he could say was a breathless "Yes" and fall into Adam's arms. They hugged tightly, but Adam pulled away and took Tommy's hand and slipped the ring on. It looked amazing on his finger, the way it shined and glistened.

They started planning the wedding shortly after the engagement. It wasn't going to be big or extravagant, but it still took time. In a matter of four months, it was set. Everything was in order and running smoothly. They got married and flew to Hawaii. Kind of fast, but it was quick and sweet. They had the best time on their honeymoon, they rarely left their room, but it was all good. When they got home everything was different, or at least it felt that way. It felt new and exciting, but most of all, it felt forever. At last they were together, but not like before, now they had proof that each others heart was in the other ones hands.

It was a fine, lazy, Saturday morning Tommy was nuzzled into Adam's chest while they sat on the couch watching TV. There was nothing to do, not that they were complaining, not working was good. But when your bored, who knows what would happen? Adam was moving a hand over Tommy's thigh, making him giggle quietly. He took his other hand and titled Tommy's head up and kissed him. He moved so Tommy fell between his legs. He was getting ready to take off Tommy's shirt when Tommy broke away from their kiss. Tommy looked at Adam for a moment then said,

"I want a baby."

Adam didn't know if he was serious or not. Either way, he didn't know what to say. He just laid there looking at Tommy with a blank stare on his face.

"Was that too soon?" Tommy asked, looking for some form of life in Adam. He said nothing for the longest time, but when he saw the look on Tommy's face, he decided to speak up.

"You really want a kid?"

"Yeah…only if you want to."

"I do but…"

"But what?" Tommy said, sitting up, bringing Adam up with him.

"But.. I don't know if we are ready for it."

"Oh, ok" Tommy said, getting and walking upstairs. Adam was still in shock from all of it. but he knew he had to talk to Tommy about it. He went upstairs to their room where he slightly opened the door. The sight he saw nearly broke his heart, his beloved was curled up on their bed crying his eyes out. He opened the door and rushed over to Tommy.

"Oh my sweet, sweet Glitterbaby." Adam said, crawling next to him and cuddling him. He petted his hair trying to clam him down.

"Adam?"

"Yes Tommy, what is it?"

"I…want a baby and you don't."

"I never said that."

"Yes you did."

"No, at least, that's not what I meant."

"You want a baby?"

"Yes…" Adam said hastily. He wasn't sure right now what he wanted.

"Ok then." Tommy's crying slowed down a bit.

"So, what now?" Adam asked, unsure of himself.

"Well…I don't know really."

"Ok?"

"But now that I know you want it too…" Tommy had to look away.

"What did you do?" Adam said, eyeing Tommy.

"I didn't I…well I.."

"Tommy, what did you do?"

"I kind of.. I kinda… put our names on the adoption list." Tommy said, biting his bottom lip.

"Tommy, why would you do that?"

"Cause I want a baby."

"You… didn't even ask or anything, you never said anything until today and now this? What's going on in your head? I mean-"

"Stop it!" Tommy yelled.

"Me? Why are you telling me this now?"

"Cause for us to go on, I need your signature."

"Oh, cause you need me." Adam smirked.

"Adam, I wanted to tell you, but I didn't know how and I figured that since I needed you for this part, I thought I'd better tell you."

"Yeah" Adam said forcefully. Tommy looked hurt on how Adam said it.

"I'm sorry, I don't mean to be this way, I just…I just… God! I don't know what I'm saying anymore."

"Its fine, we don't have to go through this."

"Yes, I want to have a baby, but, adoption?"

"Yeah…well it's not like we can have a baby and I don't want to go through someone else, so I figured this was the only way."

"True…so this is what you want?"

"Yes, I want to adopt a baby with you."

"Boy or girl?"

"I don't care, as long as its healthy and happy."

"Yeah, me too."

The next day, Adam and Tommy went down to the adoption agency to work out what was needed. Once it was all said and done, they were signed up and waiting. They didn't know how long it would be before they would bring a little bundle of joy home, but for now they were okay with everything. All was right with the world.


	12. Our Souls Will Be Okay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Epilogue
> 
> Soaked to the bone  
> Sink like a stone  
> I will take you home  
> It's not the first time  
> It's not the worst crime  
> Our souls will be okay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Week's Chapter Is Based On The Song "Soaked" by Adam Lambert.

6 months later

The blaring sound of Adam's alarm clock jolts him and Tommy awake.

"Adam, why's the 'larm clock goin' off?" slurred Tommy.

"Because today's the day!" Adam announced while bounding towards the bathroom.

"For wha-?"

"The day we get our little girl, you dumbass!" shouted Adam.

Tommy's eyes widen as he realizes this is it. The day he is going to be a dad. The day that will change the rest of his life.

Adam opens the bathroom door and starts rummaging through his closet for something impressive to wear. He wants to make a good impression on the adoption agency.

"Adam..are you sure we're ready for this? I mean, I'm having second thoughts and-"

Adam drops the black and red dress shirt he was deciding on and stares at Tommy with a frightened look. "What do you mean second thoughts? You signed the papers with me! You said you wanted this just as much as I did! You can't back out on me now!"

Tommy gets up and grabs Adam by the shoulders. "Babe, that's not what I meant. I want this more than I've ever wanted anything in my entire life. I'm just having second thoughts on myself..." Tommy bites his lip and looks up at Adam with frightened eyes. Adam wraps his arms around Tommy's waist and sighs.

"Come on, Glitter-baby, you'll be an amazing father and you know it. You're sweet, and kind, and gentle, everything a kid could want...everything anyone could want," Adam says as he pulls Tommy closer for a kiss. Tommy breathes a sigh against Adam's lips and pulls away slowly.

"I just want everything to be perfect for her, I want to be the best there is."

Adam grabs Tommy's face and looks him dead in the eye with a look so fierce that Tommy has to concentrate on not shivering from it's intensity. "Tommy Joe. Listen to me. You are perfect in every single way. You're a perfect friend, a perfect boyfriend, and you will be a perfect father. Don't think about this anymore, we're going to get our little girl today and you need to be as happy as I am. I'm nervous too, but, isn't every new parent? No one can do this without messing up a time or too, but, I know we can get through it if we have each other," Adam hugs Tommy as close to his chest as he can then pushes him towards the bathroom. "Now, get ready so we can go. And don't take too long this time! You don't need to get all glammed up for this."

Tommy rolls his eyes and begins applying some black eyeliner.

Tommy nervously plays with the bottom of his shirt as he and Adam wait for the receptionist at the adoption center to look up their info.

"Okay, Mr. Lambert, Mr. Ratliff, head down the hall to your left and go down two doors and Ms. Carter's office is the one on the right, she'll be in there," said the ragged receptionist with a fake smile.

Adams nods and says a quick "Thanks" before grabbing Tommy's wrist and tugging him down the hall. Tommy is as stiff as a board and probably looks like he's scared as shit as they enter the pink and white office.

A woman with black hair and caked on makeup stands up from the desk in front of them and holds her hand out to the two men. "Hello! You must be Adam and Tommy, it's so nice to meet you!" They both take turns shaking her hand politely then sit down as she gestures to the couch behind them.

"I bet you're both excited, right? Today's the big day! I know you're probably sick of filling out paperwork but this is the last thing you need to sign before you get to meet little Helena!" Ms. Carter pulls out a thin piece of paper and a sparkly red pen and hands it to Adam.

"I need you and Mr. Ratliff to sign your names at the bottom and then I'll take you to the nursery," she says with a smile so wide it looks almost painful.

"Why is she so damn happy? We're the ones adopting. Maybe she's giving us a demon baby and she's glad to get rid of it," Tommy thought bitterly.

"Babe, sign your name, we're waiting," Adam says while pushing the paper and pen into Tommy's hands. Tommy stares at the dotted line where his name is supposed to go before sighing and scribbing down something that resembles his name.

"Okay! Great! Now let's head down to the nursery. Follow me please." Ms. Carter stands up and walks out the door and leads Adam and Tommy down a long hallway with dozens of doors before stopping at a large windowed area that looks into a room filled with a hundred sleeping infants.

Adams jumps slightly with excitement and shoots Tommy an insanely bright smile. Tommy tries to look happy before staring as Ms. Carter picks up a small bundle from one of the cribs and starts walking towards them.

"Guys, this is Helena, your daughter," Ms. Carter says softly while handing Adam the tiny bundle of blankets and baby. Adam's eyes go wide as he stares at the little girl before scooting closer to Tommy so he can get a look. Tommy finally lets go of the hem of his shirt and goes stiff. He can't believe this is her, the girl he and Adam have been waiting to see for months.

Tommy tries to soak in every inch of her tiny body, taking a mental picture so he can lock it away in his memory forever. She's perfect. Her soft brown hair and twinkling blue eyes are stunning against her olive colored skin. Tommy reaches a finger toward her to try to feel her soft looking skin and freezes as Helena wraps her tiny fist around his index finger. This couldn't be real.

Adam looks as if he's going to cry but ends up smiling like a fool as Tommy lets a few tears of his own roll down his cheeks.

"She's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen," whispers Tommy.

The two men stare at their new daughter for a moment longer before thanking Ms. Carter and heading out the double doors to their car. As Adam carefully buckles Helena into her car-seat Tommy slides into the passenger side. Once Adam double checks to make sure the baby's seat isn't going to slide around on the way home, he gets into the driver's seat and turns to look at Tommy.

"Can you believe we finally did it? After so much waiting and so much bullshit, we finally got her. We got our baby girl," whispers Adam.

Tommy takes a deep breath and looks at his boyfriend. "Adam," he begins. "I'm sorry about earlier, I was being stupid and I was so damn nervous and-" Adam cuts him off by leaning forward in his seat and putting his hand on the back of Tommy's head.

"Don't worry about it, just forget all of that. That was before, in our old life. Let's worry about what's happening now," Adam kisses Tommy and turns back around before buckling himself in.

"Let's go home," Adam says and starts the engine. Tommy can't help but feel relieved at the finality of having Helena in their posession. Nothing could go wrong, no one could deny them their right to parent a little girl anymore. After all of the shit they went through in the past year, Tommy was glad to have his little girl and his Glitter Baby all to himself.

This is how life is supposed to be, he thought. This is what it means to live life in ecstasy.


End file.
